DREAMS OF RICE
STANDALONE comic, 2020
In the process of working on this comic I started to have mixed feelings about the messages in it, so I want to talk about that.
Gratitude is important to me. My mom taught it in a wonderful way, not forcing me but often saying stuff like "Isn't it amazing that we have fresh air to breathe, clean water to drink, and delicious food to eat!? Wow!" I'm so grateful for that gift she gave me.
I believe messages about gratitude can be important, but I'm also becoming more aware of how they can oppress people. There's an evil, (fake?) "gratitude" - a pervasive cultural attitude of shaming people for not being grateful enough / asking for too much, that says fighting for what's reasonably and rightfully ours (everything from the profits earned from our labor to the health and lives of our loved ones) makes us selfish and immoral.
Although I feel like my mom mostly did it right, I see a lot of that shame-based attitude in her, and in myself, and I worry about this comic perpetuating it. I'm trying to tease the two apart, and let go of the shame-based "gratitude" while still holding on to the helpful, joyful gratitude - in myself generally and also in the stories I'm putting out into the world. It turns out doing many hours of illustration in the service of a story that I came up with intuitively and almost instantly turned out to be a good opportunity to meditate on these unexamined ideologies I've been carrying around. I have this strong attachment to the idea of just doing what feels right but I have to come to terms with the fact that the stories we tell have consequences. I'm trying to be more careful. Its painful.
I would love to hear your thoughts around this topic if its been on your mind too. How do we cultivate gratitude in a healthy way that doesn't condemn other emotions? How do we find peace amid suffering, while still fighting for a better world? How do we become more intentional about the effect that our art has in the world while still allowing emotions and intuition to guide our creations? Send me your thoughts via the contact page!